Guys I really have no other place I can air out my thoughts anymore, so just humor me on this.

I am stopping the entry a day thing. Mostly because I don't really see a point. I really don't think I have grown any or at least to a point of where I need to be and uploading things from 05 are not helping me with this.

The reason I have been uploading things from 05 is because I can't find my cable to get anything off my camera. I haven't seen it since I came home from SCAD and a few other things are missing as well. Like my DS charger (Which we have known about) and My DVD of LITTLE NEMO which it really bugging me. Also all of these things were last seen together and were packed by my mom. So I am a little worried.

I also have had a bitch of a time trying to get a job. I was supposed to be working at a photo studio, but according to my dad I didn't get it because I, "Post on twitter too much." Of course I have made it so that google searches will not show me. Trust me I have looked. I am a very hard person to find, unless you know me. I like it this way. On a brighter note I applied at the Lego store. If I get that it will be the happiest thing to happen all summer.

Speaking of my father another crushing blow came when he said. "I have never given a rats ass about you." Basically my home life has been me locked up in my room or being close to my mom. Because I am constantly being attacked by both my father and my brother. I have tried to patch things over with him. But it seems like since I have been back nothing I do is right. He showed more emotion in the fact that Michael Jackson died then anything I have done this year. Which trust me I have been looking for him to say that I have done something good for a long time. And now I am forced to do something that I don't like to do. I'm giving up trying to please him.

If you are still reading this I need to throw in something. I never fathomed hoe depressed I was here. Then i went to SCAD and all my problems got better. Now I'm back in my own little hell. I miss being optimistic about things and smiling. That doesn't happen here. So if you see me on skype or something and have the time to talk please do. It really will help me from going insane. I feel myself going back into my shell and I can't have that happen again.